鲜花( 1394) 鸡蛋( 16)
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9 \( f0 M9 l, g# P$ g/ Z4 aWhy did God make mothers?
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
+ T) e. B7 a! y% i! M- @1 N2. Mostly to clean the house.
. G" i; c. e) k. }; }( n) t+ g3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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3 X' a: }" R6 G g! I/ M( P0 \How did God make mothers?
4 X3 ?9 Z, Q8 A# \1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.; \: B! b; m# y! B% R; n
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
) D: @( ~" d2 M* y) y* f/ x5 L3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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1 K% ~+ K* E+ hWhat ingredients are mothers made of ?
0 J/ H* w3 S) n$ `" a- D# Q- @1 u1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
% N% i1 G5 Z) y6 I2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. 7 i9 b `5 T8 H" e
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom? 1 a" r6 f# x( }! l
1. We're related.
) b0 q7 P, P, D$ G# ?/ A; M/ u2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
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G& x5 W: k: L5 |9 ~7 l. JWhat kind of little girl was your mom? 9 h* f: q9 v9 c
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. 5 z5 ` k2 |4 T" h2 S/ P! h
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
" `4 |" A+ k# y% h* F4 ^3. They say she used to be nice.
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
: P; m& |6 p1 ]2 ]! @" H1. His last name.% f3 }3 O/ O. C
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
3 H+ Z' V1 g- n( f0 x4 D3 d9 y- x1 b1 D3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? " J# q" m! o* X% e6 X+ m
8 l! |* K' h: J, M$ G: `& D$ lWhy did your mom marry your dad?
% ^& _8 \1 M/ @' N, L1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
1 ?8 t7 E2 l6 u" j# R/ k) {' c1 Z2. She got too old to do anything else with him. & {; l- t2 ?0 M/ G0 N0 G9 e5 H4 m& d
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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5 G9 F, U2 ?* x! [0 C% D& }: GWho's the boss at your house?
. @, Q/ g( l+ [7 m' E' {$ R& J5 D1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. ; C& ~; q6 x; E7 P
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
9 ?: u. x2 o9 K/ E" `( u) S) Y; }2 ~3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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What's the difference between moms & dads? ( G7 d( s: W+ \. @* c! q
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work. 7 n) s1 n# {7 S+ |( c
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
7 d- ~. E* f# u/ C" z: _3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
1 B- o% D; l% A; M5 s4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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What does your mom do in her spare time? 2 j9 a [) V8 A. `- j; P
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
# a$ Q- w+ D+ X' S2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. 9 e- M" W# G! |8 [6 k
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What would it take to make your mom perfect? 8 f9 S, T* {& f5 E, @
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery./ A. d1 O9 ] B) Y7 N7 {7 ~
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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) q. V& H" Z7 f5 W3 cIf you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? 4 b' W/ p4 k9 Z7 b
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
2 _: {2 ]4 p8 Q5 Z2 l2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.: k, ^. [9 e5 q9 [4 j" I0 M( H
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head. 3 Z5 f2 [" @; O2 [; V/ u# e
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